Clash Of The Geeks
by CelestiaLily
Summary: BB visits the video store to rent the only copy of Clash Of The Planets: The Lost Season. But he gets more than he bargained for when Control Freak shows up wanting it too. Chaos ensues! Generally canon pairings, implied RobStar.
1. Excited!

**Disclaimer: I do not own **_**Teen Titans. **_

_Excitement:_

Beast Boy had been looking forward to this day all week. It was the day when the _Clash Of The Planets: The Lost Season_ was going to be released, and he was prepared for an all-out geek-a-thon. 7 hours straight, complete with plasma-screen TV, surround sound and plenty of munchies. Thank goodness there were no baddies around to spoil the fun.

As soon as Robin had reluctantly let him go to the mainland, BB flew over and strutted down the street to his favourite movie store. Beast Boy even started whistling a tune as he praised his good luck. Today was gonna be _awesome._

The cashier glanced at Beast Boy as he opened the door; obviously she knew that it was in stock and his obsession with the (cough _nerdy_ cough) series was well known. She was still recovering from that incident with the crazy couch potato Control Freak wreaking the entire store. The green superhero zoomed in and she pointed wearily in the general direction of the display case. _Why, oh why was Jump City the only western city to have teen superheros? Normal teens were crazy enough..._

Beast Boy passed the isles quickly, eyes alert and scanning for his prize. Comedy, Family, Horror, -Big overcoat guy?

BONK! "Sorry dude!" BB picked himself up and kept on running, without even looking to see who the guy was. Typical.

He took a wrong turn and ended up in an isle dedicated to his favourite anime series. Clearly distracted, he failed to notice the overcoat guy selecting a disc and heading to the counter to pay. _FOCUS!_ he thought. Zoom...finally!

Expecting to bask in the glory of all that is nerdy, Beast Boy opened his eyes to... nothing? _...Wha...? It was,- she said,-... where did it go? _he puzzled.

BB raced back to find the big overcoat guy holding the only copy of _Clash Of The Planets: The Lost Season._ The cashier looked rather flustered.

"Hey, that's MY copy buster! Get your own! Who do you think you are anyway?" Beast Boy exclaimed.

Never one to miss a dramatic opportunity, the guy flung off the overcoat to reveal.. "Who am I? Why I am the one, the only, CONTROL FREAK!"

Beast Boy facepalmed. _Of ALL the villains he had to meet RIGHT NOW, of COURSE Control Freak would be the one to cause trouble at this exact store!_

As a protector of Jump City, it was BB's heroic duty to stop any villain and put them to rightful justice. _But more importantly..._

"You're not gonna get away with _my_ copy of _Clash Of The Planets_ Control Freak!"

_He had to get that video first._


	2. It's Mine!

**Disclaimer: I do not own **_**Teen Titans.**_

_It's Mine!_

Control Freak laughed rather obnoxiously. But inwardly he was cursing the annoying green superhero for showing up at this store. _Oh well. This lost season is more than worth the fight,_ he thought gleefully.

In fact, Control Freak was about to retort with some witty comment when he was suddenly ploughed backwards into the counter by a snorting green bull. The cashier screamed and fled, cursing her luck to be working the day that a couch potato villain and a geeky super-teen were fighting over a stupid TV show.

_ This whole city is crazy!_ She thought as she ran to contact the rest of the Teen Titans. _Great. More teenagers involved._ Too bad the police couldn't handle the ruckus, or else there wouldn't be any of these hyperactive delinquents in spandex to ruin her job.

Control Freak was pinned to the concession stand by the bull's horns, but he still held the _Clash Of The Planets_ disc in one hand. With the other he fished his tricked-out remote from his belt and fired a bright laser beam into Beast Boy's eyes.

Stunned momentarily because of the blinding light, BB bellowed and snorted as Control Freak was able to jump over his head and (embarrassingly,) ride Beast Boy like a rodeo bull. Bucking and tossing his unwanted rider, BB accidentally stomped on a small garbage can and got his back left leg stuck in it. This was getting messy.

Finally Beast Boy heard a satisfying "BONK!" as Control Freak was whacked off his back by an overhanging billboard. He saw the man go flying into the next isle, and quickly changed into a wolf and kicked off the trash can. Control Freak's scent was unmistakable, the air reeking of old pizza and the metallic smell of fear.

BB clambered over the movie isle and launched himself at the source of the stench, but a cardboard stand of some romance movie tackled him from the side and he skidded across the floor to the Family section. The cardboard stand was soon torn to shreds, but as he groggily stood up Beast Boy realized he had lost him.

That nerdy grease-monkey fanboy wasn't getting away with the only rental in the store. He would make him _pay._


	3. Help Is On The Way Sort Of

**Disclaimer: I do not own **_**Teen Titans.**_

_Help Is On The Way (Sort Of)_

Raven walked out of the indoor gym just after her morning Pilates session, and was _really_ looking forward to a cooling shower and finishing her book. That was a routine she always followed, and even though it didn't count as her sacred "alone time" _per se,_ she did _not_ enjoy being interrupted at all. Especially not when she was all hot and sticky.

So when she passed by a computer on the way to the bathroom and it beeped out a police distress signal, Raven felt irked and _not_ in the mood to spring into action just then. But somewhere in Jump was a crisis that shouldn't be ignored by its protectors.

So Raven whined. "Robin!...Cyborg!...Starfire!..." Too tired to use her powers to locate them, she scolded herself for sounding so whiny and embarrassing.

She would find her teammates, and then they would answer the distress call. But first, she _really_ needed a shower.

_ This is not going as planned..._ Control Freak admitted silently as he raced through the New Releases isle. The whole store was getting trashed, and all he really wanted was the lost season of his favourite TV show. Was that so much to ask? He was undercover, not causing any trouble at all, and planning for a _Clash of the Planets_ marathon today. It was his day off for crying out loud! Even the mighty Control Freak had more important things to do than be a mastermind criminal all the time! Too bad Beast Boy had to show up... Man, he had been working on some super-awesome weapons that could defeat the green annoyance once and for all, but of all days to go undercover without bringing any of them, it was _today._ Whatever. He was gonna have that disc, no matter what.

"Try out our new Flame-Grilled Triple-Decker Cheesonator!-" khhrr- "Oh my darling cupcake, whatever shall we do?-" khhrr- "Your mama's so fat, she-" khhrrrr...

_Ughh..._ Starfire thought. She was slouched on the couch in the Titan's common room, flipping through channels and feeling _soooo_ bored. Ever since her favourite show, _World Of Fungus_ was cancelled recently, Starfire couldn't find _anything_ to watch that was remotely interesting and wouldn't confuse her with Earth's complicated sayings.

One thing she didn't understand was why these sayings weren't transferred into her knowledge when she had made the "lip contact" with Robin.

A subtle blush arose on her cheeks as she remembered that first meeting. Something she had learned on Earth was that romantic relationships involved both partners being "good kissers." For a boy from Earth, (she didn't use the name of "Earthling" that she had seen many "aliens" do on T.V. Now _that_ was just silly!), Starfire wondered whether Robin was considered a "good kisser" or not...

Gah! She had to stop thinking that way! _Okay, change the subject, just quit thinking about Robin and kissing and romance for a minute..._

_Alright. Back to my question. Why haven't I gotten a complete English translation from the lip contact? Maybe...more time is needed for a complete translation?...Huh. I will need to return to Tamaran to study the exact science behind this...And maybe an experimentation? But that would involve a willing subject, and who would want to- X'hal! Why do my thoughts always return to Robin and lip contact?_

Starfire's thoughts were (thankfully!) interrupted by a news bulletin showing a calamity somewhere in the western district. The camera zoomed in to focus on a building that was being vandalized and wreaked by 2 individuals that looked familiar..

Beast Boy and that villain Control Freak! They were attacking each other with much enthusiasm in the local video store Beast Boy had begged Robin to visit. Starfire noticed a frazzled cashier fleeing the building, and the whole spectacle was gathering a small crowd of bystanders watching the chaos of the brawl.

The news was interrupted by a flashing Titan signal. Starfire jumped up and ran out to find her teammates. She had only ran a few steps when she realized that she had no idea where they were.

_Oh X'hal, why does this tower have to be so big?_ Starfire groaned. Looking for all of her teammates would take _forever..._

Finally she quickly fished out her communicator (feeling quite silly for not doing it before,) and called everyone in the Tower to notify them of Beast Boy's trouble.

"Team, come in! Trouble is occurring on the mainland! Do you read me?" Her fervent message was responded by Robin's authoritative tone,

"Copy that, Star. What's the problem?"

"Beast Boy is fighting Control Freak right now in that video store he was going to. He needs our assistance in "kicking the butt," and returning Control Freak to jail!"

"Why hasn't BB contacted us with his communicator?" Cyborg's questioning voice cut in. Starfire considered that. It was odd for her teammate to not ask their assistance...

"I do not know. Anyway, we should go there right now to help him."

"Alright. Cy, you fire up the T-car. I'll be there soon." Robin ordered.

"Yeah, finally some kick-butt time! See ya there, Cyborg out." His portion of the communicator screen blinked out.

"Hey Star, do you know where Raven is? She hasn't answered yet." Robin asked.

"I believe she is in the shower, Robin. She usually has one around this time."

"Fine. We'll just have to do this without her. I'll meet you there, Star. Robin out."

Starfire pocketed her communicator and opened the window to leave. As she launched herself out of the Tower she smiled briefly. She liked it when he called her Star.


	4. Monkey Business

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Teen Titans._**

_Monkey Business_

It had been almost 2 minutes and Beast Boy still couldn't find Control Freak. But he could hear sounds of destruction and could only assume that he was using his remote to create more baddies. "Come out of hiding and surrender, for you are no match for the awesome Control Freak!" _SHUT UP ALREADY! _Beast Boy pleaded silently, annoyed at this wannabe villain and his big fat ego.

There was one thing good about Control Freak's declaration however; that his whiny voice had sent an obvious signal to BB about his whereabouts.

_Though he's kinda hard to miss with all of his rotundness..._ Beast Boy smirked, transformed into a mosquito and zoomed over the mess to the checkout counter.

When he said it was a mess, he meant it. 4 movie isles had collapsed on each other like dominoes, various movies were strewn across the floor and the front windows had been shattered. But still no _Clash Of The Planets_... Even though his fly vision was grainy and kaleidoscopic, BB could make out a small crowd that were watching the destruction.

Beast Boy let his pride get to him. He was famous! Might as well give his crowd something to see. _You guys wanna see a show? Well, how about seeing your favourite superhero taking care of biz? Oh yeah!_

Spiralling down towards an unsuspecting Control Freak who was holding the disc in his hand, BB quickly changed into a monkey, snatched the copy and bounded on top of a swinging light. He watched with glee as Control Freak turned and shook his fist at him, then started jumping and reaching in desperation to grab Beast Boy's prize.

The whole thing was so funny that the crowd snickered and cheered, causing Control Freak to whirl around and exclaim loudly at them, which made them laugh even harder. To go one step further BB monkey-cackled, gained Control Freak's attention and proceeded to make fun of him using many crude yet humorous gestures.

** (Author's Note: **Not inappropriate gestures. Just crude. Beast Boy isn't that offensive.**)**

The crowd got a riot out of it. For the ultimate finale, BB transformed back into a human and taunted, "Hey Control Freak! Your mama's so fat, she-"

He heard a crack. Looking up, he noticed that the light fixture he was standing on was breaking from his weight. With almost comical slowness, the light gave way as Beast Boy panicked and launched himself off. Taking this as an opportunity, he changed into a tiger and pounced, landing with a THUD on Control Freak.

But he had forgotten to take into account all of Control Freak's minions. Rabid candy bars started biting his ankles and 2 cardboard cutouts hauled him off their master, while a third one gave him a beating with some popcorn buckets.

_Ow, ow ow-OW! _BB thought, seriously humiliated in front of his adoring fans. He saw Control Freak dust himself off and open his mouth to gloat. But something caught his eye and- Aw MAN! Beast Boy had forgotten about the _Clash Of The Planets_ disc after he had jumped off the light, and now it was resting in the sweaty mitts of his nemesis.


	5. Busted!

**Disclaimer: I do not own _Teen Titans._**

_Busted!_

_ SHHIZZAPP!_ Control Freak froze, _literally_ froze in the explosion of one of Robin's freeze-a-rangs. BB looked around in confusion, then it dawned on him as Starfire, Cyborg and Robin stepped into the store. Cyborg picked up Control Freak's remote that had clattered to the floor when he froze. Snapping it in half easily, Beast Boy felt relieved as the cardboard cutouts and demonic candy returned to normal. He was suddenly squeezed in one of Starfire's hugs. Thankfully she let him go and proclaimed,

"Beast Boy! I am glad to see you well after your battle with Control Freak!"

"Uh, thanks Starfire."

Starfire casually picked up the frozen Control Freak in one hand and stepped outside to turn him over to the police, who had conveniently showed up just then. Having the Teen Titans around meant that the Jump City Police were used to showing up with the baddies already beaten.

"Beast Boy, how did this mess start? Was Control Freak after anything important?" Robin enquired. That reminded him...

With odd looks from both Robin and Cy, BB fervently searched the ground for the _Clash Of The Planets: The Lost Season_ that Control Freak had dropped. YES!

"Uh, yeah, actually..." Beast Boy began, "He was after this!" He held up the disc.

Unaware of Robin's look, BB grinned and said,

"Well, all in a day's work right? Now, let's go sign some autographs!"

He was about to stride off to meet his fans when Robin stepped in front of him, arms crossed. "Beast Boy, you're saying that this _entire store_ was demolished because the 2 of you were fighting over a _TV series?_"

BB's face fell dramatically as he realized what Robin was saying.

"Aw, come on Robin! It wasn't,- I mean,-...It's _Clash Of The Planets: The Lost Season_ dude! That's totally worth it, right? I've been waiting for this to come out for a _really_ long time..." Beast Boy had never come so close as to pulling the puppy face on his leader as he had now. Robin was... not buying it.

"That was really irresponsible of you Beast Boy. I'm going to have to revoke your "Clash Of The Planets privileges" until you learn that the safety of the city comes before your own materialistic desires."

That was (in BB's fanboy mind), the worst punishment in the world right now.

"Just be glad you didn't have to pay for the property damage with your own money." was Robin's parting sentence.

Cyborg flashed the poor changeling a sympathetic smile...with a suspiciously cheerful wave? _What does _that_ mean?_ Beast Boy wondered.


	6. Fanboys

**Disclaimer: I do not own **_**Teen Titans.**_

_Fanboys_

After BB had flown dejectedly back to the Tower, Starfire tried to cheer him up with her cooking. He felt bad for rejecting her offer, but what he needed was some time alone.

On the way there, he accidentally bumped into a wet-haired Raven who was miraculously able to walk, read and apologize absentmindedly to him without getting a drop of water on her book in her hand.

Beast Boy was kinda weirded out at the fact that _Raven _was _apologizing_ to _him, _especially after she had heard about his little escapade that cost the Teen Titans some of their credibility. But he figured that perhaps she was at least not being mean to him to make up for Robin's punishment. It was still odd to think about.

Aw well. It was about time for his afternoon nap anyways. He plopped down onto his bed and promptly started snoring.

"Robin, do you mind if I visit Titans East for a while?" Cyborg asked early the next morning. Robin looked up from the newspaper article featuring the _events_ of the day before. He regarded Cyborg's question slowly.

"Any reason in particular?"

"Just to visit. I won't be gone for long, maybe just today and tomorrow."

"Well... we don't seem to have anything important, and this _is_ rather a slow week for crime. Sure Cy, I'm sure they would like to see you again."

Cyborg grinned, almost suspiciously, Robin thought. "Thanks man! I'll be back soon, and just call if you need me." He held up his communicator and turned to leave.

Robin went back to the article. He would tell the others when they woke up.

Bumblebee entered the Titans East common room to an irritating sight. When Cyborg had said he was coming for a visit, she had assumed that his visit would involve more than having all of the guys in the tower glued to the TV.

"And what, do tell, is the current occupation of _everyone's_ interest in this place?" Bumblebee questioned. Aqualad was watching from the pool, Mas Y Menos were fighting for control over the munchies (in very fast and angry Spanish,) and Speedy and Cyborg were shouting and pumping their fists in the air. She looked at the screen and saw a bunch of explosions, some guys in funny clothing and heard a lot of battle cries.

She walked behind the couch, tapped Cy on the shoulder, and when that didn't get his attention, she yelled in his ear, "WHAT ON EARTH IS THIS SHOW?"

When she finally got an answer from him, it was an absentminded, "Clash Of The Planets: The Lost Season."

Speedy piped up, "Came out just yesterday in Steel City Video Store."

Aqualad added distractedly, "Only one copy in the whole city."

Even Mas Y Menos stopped fighting over the chips to exclaim how awesome it was.

Bumblebee just snorted. Boys will be boys...

**End**


End file.
